Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Teioh eps 1-6

Teioh - King of getting girls without doing anything.

Teioh is another midnight dorama set in the world of host/kyabakura so quality is not expected. One can't expect much from low budget shows with half an hour runtime. However, this show is bad, real bad. Its so bad that its makes Giragira look like KDO. Tsukamoto Takashi (KDO's assistant) is Sakaki Ryo, a directionless young man who we are told at the beginning will end up as the owner of multiple kyabakura clubs.

She looks so familiar yet I can't put a name to that face....

Maybe her very nice valley will jog my memory....

Ryo is an uneducated person working boring job in a factory until he realises that he doesn't want to end up wasting his life away and quits his job. Ryo's friend ends up fighting with a host, Renzo over the friend's ex-gf. Renzo challenges Ryo to face him in the world of hosts and Ryo uses vengeance as a motivation to decide his next step in life.

How I'd love to be a grumpy old man in jdoramas.

Women locker room business.

Like Giragira, Ryo is an uber idealistic character. The whole hosts should not fleece clients for money etc etc. Idealism is a necessary evil since no jdorama wants to make a more realistic exploration of such businesses. Not to mention that basically all host/kyabakura jdoramas are based on mangas anyway. The main problem with Ryo is that he has not other positive characteristics besides being a nice guy.

Love this shot of Nagasawa Nao.

It feels like Ryo is the okyakusan rather than the host.

Giragira at least showed some techniques on how to handle clients and how to engage them in conversation. We get to see his skills at work and to the audience, he is a skilled host and worthy of our support. In Teioh, we don't even see Ryo doing anything. He doesn't sing, he doesn't drink and he sits there like an idiot. We doin't even get to see his conversation skills. He is just... nice and the fact that he manages to get somewhere without doing anything or having any discernible skills at all defies all logic.

Tachibano Ayana & Nagasawa Nao.

Random girl in show.

Like his host battle with Renjo where Ryo wins because Renjo self-destructs. We do not see why any of the girls would want to spend money on Ryo. Especially Sayaka who acts like a good daughter but continues to spend money on Ryo despite her father being heavily in debt. Basically the plot in Teioh is full of holes the size of the moon and feels like a shounen manga written for primary school kids.

Hhmm, I see thighs.

If only being a host was this easy.

Things happen for no apparent reason. Fake nice guy dialogue that make me want to bash my head against the wall until I am numb with pain. It is just unfathomable that whoever wrote the script had a brain and the actors could keep a straight face while reciting the god-awful lines. Surely they can do a much better job ad-libbing their lines. Let's not mention the soft drink speech that Nagasawa Nao gives in ep 2.

I'd come to this bar everyday.

Why watch this show then? Well, the pictures speak for themselves. This is a pure eye candy series. Its like a candy where on the outside its better and puke inducing and on the inside, it tastes like heaven. The amount of beautiful looking actresses and idols on this show is staggering. Even the girls playing small parts look absolutely gorgeous. This show is the perfect way to update myself on some of the gravure idols.

Still can't figure out her name despite looking in the Japanese wiki.

More than happy to give her a hug.

Nagasawa Nao as Sayaka really evokes my memories of Abe Natsumi. She's like the perfect girl next door. Tachibana Ayano is pure win and somehow looks good with her two front teeth. There's Michi Saito, Noshinme May and Wakana Matsumoto. Teioh is fucking gravure idol heaven. And lets not forget Adachi Yumi who plays the hot single mom hostess Eri. Teioh is pure visual stimulation so stop your blood from flowing into your brain and you'll be fine.

The show finally gets better when Ryo finally decides to stop being a host. Now his nice guy attitude can be used to solve problems instead of making him look like an inept host who does not deserve all the chicks. I am convinced Tsukamoto Takashi did this show for the chicks. I would have paid money just to on screen with all those lovely idols.

Another random girl who has just a few minutes of screen time. This show has more girls than it knows what to do with.

In summation, if you are a gravure idol fan, Teioh is a must watch. As a jdorama, it is beyond bad. It is a disgrace. Whoever wrote the screenplay should not be called a professional. As a series of gravure videos, however it is pure gold. I bloody spent one hour just taking screencaps. Teioh is basically the embodiment of Ryo's favourite phrase; you have to go through the bad stuff in order to enjoy the good. I've mentioned this before but if you want a realistic peek at what the host business is actually all about, hunt for this documentary called 'The Great Happiness Space'. It is guaranteed to be an eye opening experience.


Anonymous said...

I know exactly what you're talking about. I spent all those episodes wondering who she (woman in second/third picture) is. She looks really familiar but for the life of me, I can't remember what her name is. And of course, the wiki and the official website are useless.

maiku said...

By the way...Tsukamoto is also in Manhattan Love Story, which SARS is close to wrapping up. Pretty damn funny. I recommend it!

Akiramike said...

Still can't find out who the woman in red is. I've asked in d-addicts and even javtalk. She look so familiar. I might even have her gravure vids somewhere.

Thanks, I'll give Manhattan Love Story a try since its a Koizumi Kyoko dorama. No idea how I never noticed it.

maiku said...

SARS (Amrayu) got annoyed by the streaming sites and decided to only release MLS via IRC. (At least initially.) I imagine they'll do a batch torrent later. The last episode just went up today.

Yep, Koizumi Kyoko with Kudo Kankuro writing (Tiger & Dragon, Kisarazu Cat's Eye, etc.). I've always been a semi-fan of Kudo. I like that he takes chances but they're usually hit or miss with me. This is the first one I've truly enjoyed completely.

Anonymous said...

He certainly plays a unique role in Manhattan... It'd be a shocking spoiler to say more!

Anonymous said...

I think your mystery girl is Hashimoto Manami, who firt appeared in Shimokita Glory Days.

Akiramike said...

Sankyu for identifying the mystery girl! No wonder she looked so familiar. I also saw her in Oneechanbara. No wonder she looked so familiar.