Jmovie review: Warau Michael

Euno Juri, one of the most promising young actresses. An all girl high school on an island. A lolicon nun. Super powers and martial arts. There's no fucking way they could mess this movie up right? Once again, Japanese cinema has taken good concepts and managed to make a mess of it.

I demand more nuns in jmovies and jdoramas.

I'm not familiar with the manga/anime this movie is base on. Basically its a mahou shoujo type story right down to the cliches. I can live with that. The movie is definitely not aimed at me. What I cannot stand is the shoddy CG and horrible action. (One would think that watching so many Japanese movies I would be wiser)

I want to be a teacher at an all-girls school when I grow up

Basically the whole movie was shot on greenscreen. Even simple backgrounds. I suppose this is to give the movie a 'fantasy' feel. On the other hand, a lot of times the CG looks so crap that it distracts from the actual movie. Especially that ending battle which had some of the worst CG ever. I've seen better graphics on my Saturn.

Can you say cosplay?

Storyline wise, its cliche riddled with more cliches, which I don't really mind. I was looking forward to the action. Sadly, sentai shows have better action. Basically the stuntmen are just throwing themselves around. Its like watching the fight scene in Morning Cop. (ugh, how did I remember that movie)

A most disappointing bunch of villians. I was hoping for a leather nun outfit at least.

The worst sin of this movie is the lolicon nun subplot. When she kidnapped the hime, I was eagerly expecting a scene involving leather nun outfit, handcuffs and maybe whips. Maybe they'll include that in the DVD. Avoid, unless you're a 10 year old girl. In which case, you shouldn't be reading this blog.

Euno Juri looking to kick her manager's arse for making her do this film.

OMG! Ryu Ga Gotoku movie!

I love Yakuza aka Ryu Ga Gotoku, a Shenmue lite game brawler for PS2. Speaking of ShenMue, Where the fuck is Shenmue 3? I would spend aud$1k for a PS3 right now just to play the freaking game. I hope Yu Suzuki is working on it right now instead of that crappy Shenmue online thing that was announced ages ago.

Love this shot, really looks like the game. And they have to include the best line from Yakuza into the movie.

Haruka: Uncle Kazuma, what's a soapland?

Besides the fact that Yakuza is the closest thing to Shenmue 3 I can get, its also the game that older gamers want. Kick arse action and violence, good story, lots of mature content and fun gameplay. When I was playing the game I was wondering how they would make it a jdorama and dream casting (hehe) the characters.

FFS, Kazuma doesn't use guns. He uses knives, billboards, swords, knuckle brass and Kendo sticks. The only time he used a gun was in the car chase scene.

To my surprise, a Ryu Ga Gotoku movie is already out! And its produced by Takashi Miike. And imdb search reveals that its only a 43 minute short. I'm not confident with the casting though. Kitamura Kazuki just doesn't have the tough guy look. Plus he's always been playing weird characters and he just doesn't have the voice.

Wheee, Saeko's in the show. Somehow I doubt she's playing the stripper GF of the host.

If casting based on looks, the guy who looks most like Kazuma is Fukami Motoki, Enzo's friend from Hotman. All he has to do is bulk up, sneer a bit more and don't smile. Plus, he's got the height. Kazuma has to bloody look like he can beat up a room full of ppl.

Wipe that smile of his face and he'll look like Kazuma Kiryu.

Haruka: Uncle Kazuma, you have messages from Reika, Chisa and Hiromi.

Kazuma: eerr, those are messages for help. I'm a yakuza, I help cabaret girls.

Its interesting that they've cast the Nanisama guy as Majima. That character reminds me of Gary Oldman's character in the professional. Hhmm, another story involving a tough guy and little girl. Anyways, I just hope I'll run into a torrent for the short one of these days. The one thing that'll make me happier is if Sega announces that Yakuza 2 will be subbed and not dubbed.


All pictures were stolen without permission from gamebrink.

Himitsu no Hanazono ep 1-4

Probably the best show this season, which isn't saying anything considering the quality of shows. I'd have to say it more to do with the strength of the concept rather than the execution. HnH tells the story of Tsukiyama who a former fashion magazine writer turned shoujo manga editor. The catch of the show is that the mangaka she is in charge of, Hanazono Yuriko is really 4 brothers.

Can u say Bukkake? Whatever happens, at least she's got a career in JAV.

Basically this is a harem dorama for women. You have 4 bros with different personalities, blah blah. I've got no problem with that. What I have a problem with is that poofter youngest brother. His acting is as atrocious as Goto Maki's. I'm so sick of bishonen who should be ashamed of calling themselves men showing up in jdoramas. Yeah, I know girls dig guys who look like chicks but ffs if this keeps up, the next generation of Japanese boys will grow up thinking Gackt and Tsunku are role models.

WTF, you're only a B cup? The minimum size for middle ages tavern wench clothing is C cup!

Anyway another aspect of the show that they could have bloody played around with more is the manga part. Basically the manga stuff takes a backseat to Tsukiyama's relationship with the bros. There's so much otaku stuff that they can tap. Put shoujo manga cliches into the show, etc etc. I just feel that there's too much potential with the story that's being wasted. 4 bros is too much. They should have gotten rid of the poof. I'd certainly speed up the story.

Another series about a manga author is Egao no Hosoku which is a very pedestrian series except that they way it was set up, one couldn't expect much more. HnH has so much fucking potential its not funny.

I'd love to do stuff like this, which is probably why I'll never be in management...

OK, it got better in ep 4. I think the revelation of the 'butler' as the Editor's old flame is funny and they should play it as corny as possible. Story is speeding up so maybe the series will switch into 5th gear all the way to the end.

If you're thinking she looks familiar, she's Matsuoka Rinako, one of the violin girls from Nodame. As hot as she is too bad her part sucks.

Its interesting to see another show featuring a long time supporting actress. Most fans will remember Yumiko Shaku as the teacher from Stand Up and as the main chick from Princess Blade. I must say, unlike Konishi Manami, I don't see potential for her. Its not that she's bad but just that she doesn't stand out.

Oh yeah, I gave Kira Kira kensui another try and tried to watch ep 3. The key word is tried. Sigh. I think I'll just play Ryuga no Gotoku 2 and wait for next season.

Byakuyakou ep 7

Finally the series has turned a corner after the slowness of the past few eps. I attribute it to Ayase Haruka to finally finding her 'voice' as Yukiho. This is the first time in the series that I'm able to link her character with Fukuda Mayuko's incredible acting in ep 1.


I would attribute this change to two scenes. First the scene where she smiles at Sasagaki and the rooftop scene at the end. Maybe its the writing or that she has finally found her groove. It echoes the characters in the show where in the end they come to grips with their situation and set on their respective paths.


Storyline wise, the story is finally moving. Perhaps is the excitement of seeing the beginning of the end? Nevertheless, the players in the game have moved to new positions and some other characters may have a say in what happens. Yukiho finally gets married to a rich guy and Ryouji finally gets office manager type job. I think this has sort off added an element of danger to the story. They have more to lose now and will have to question how much weight their past has on their future.


I think the main problem with the series so far is that the episodes don't stand alone well enough and SARS sporadic releases kinda spoils the flow. Still, its a pretty good show (especially compared with the shows this season) and I have a feeling that its going to get better during the home stretch.

Kira Kira Kenshui ep 1+ 2

Don't u think she looks like Tanaka Rena?

I really wanted to like this show. This is Konishi Manami's first shot at being a leading actress. She's done her time as a supporting actress and she's clearly a better actress than most of them out there. Hotman 2 really sucked without her. I was looking to see her being more than just eye candy.

Yes, I'm shocked that this show is so unfunny

Unfortunately within the 1st five minutes, I could tell this show was really crap. They're trying too freaking hard to make it funny that its not and becomes fucking unbearable. I've gotta say, this is the first jdorama where the humour completely falls flat on its face. Its as if the jokes were written for 5 year old girls or something. The only funny thing is the doctor who walks around like a yakuza. They could have at least milked it with him having junior doctors as underlings and extorting money from patients and stuff. They could have had fights for territory (patients). Fucking TBS should hire me to save the show.


Secondly the story is really crap. Konishi Manami plays an intern. The thing is, her 'problems' are so trivial and insignificant that you don't give a fuck. Like working when you're sick or tying a fucking string. OK, its not that insignificant but just the way they present it makes it so lame. This show makes Nurse Aoi look like a classic.


With the bad stuff out of the way, lets talk Konishi Manami. Fuck, she is even hotter than before. Somehow her shorter haircut makes her look even younger. And the shorter hair sorta emphasises her eyes more. I'd just be happy if only the show was barely watchable.

The only cute nurse on the show, unfortunately. Jdoramas should stop trying to cast realistic looking nurses and cast more JAV types.

Acting wise, she's decent. She's basically doing her best impersonation of the Fukada Kyoko kawaii but donkan type girl. IMO, she does it better but its hard to separate the acting from how crap the show is. Sigh. I just hope this doesn't prevent her being being the leading lady again. In summary avoid. I'm torn between dropping it and somehow praying that the series will at least find its legs soon. Maybe I should treat the show as a Konishi Manami gravure vid....

Kawaii!!!!!!! Can't believe she's bloody older than me.

Enka no Joou ep 1+2

The Good

Amami Yuki: Damn good acting as Himawari. Unfortunately, good acting + crap story does not equal watchable show

Sakai Wakana: hotness. Last saw recurring role I saw her in was Koi Seyo otome. I'm interested in seeing what she can do besides the uber kawaii woman.


The bad

Storywise, this show is boring. Basically its about the dumbest woman in Japan who happens to have a thing for a loser who's screwed her life too many times to count. Seriously, how the fuck do they expect the audience to get behind her? Compare this with the initial idea of 101 Proposals. 101 was suppose to be a dark comedy about a guy who screws up his life in pursuit of a woman. (They changed the story to a happy ending after it became too popular)

Fukuda Mayuko just doesn't look comfortable playing a happy character. Someone write her another dark and depressing role.

My point is, to get behind a character they need to have a goal and they can't be too stupid. Himawari wants to get to Kouhaku but is she working to that goal? No. She's still getting involved with Hitoshi's business. Basically, I don't give a fuck about any of the characters in the show.

Humour? What humour. Its not funny. Unless you find an idiotic enka singer ruining what's left of her life to be funny. There's no drama. There's no humour. What's the freaking point of the show?



The ugly

Only in Japan can a show have a married man go to a love hotel with a joshi kousei and not get arrested for statutary rape. Or have right wing groups boycotting the show for promoting enjokousai. Wait.... that's not a bad thing... is it?

Yes, I know Narumi Riko has lotsa potential but for gods sake, just wait til she's 18. On a side note, I believe the legal age in Japan is 13 or something. Don't quote me on that but I think I have the link in my bookmark somewhere...

The ratings. This story needs to go somewhere interesting quick.

2006 Jdorama ramblings (special OL edition)

I'm too lazy to look for pics/make caps so I hope you'll enjoy these OL pics. The only thing hotter than joshi kousei are OLs... and CAs.... and maids..... So let the rambling begin!

14 SAI NO HAHA

Not gritty or realistic enough which was the same problem with Ichi Litre no Namida. Except in Ichi Litre I had Sawajiri Erika to perv at. Its too easy for Miki to say she was going to have the baby. The ones who are going to suffer are going to be the parents. Its more their decision than hers. They're the ones who are going to have to work hard for the next 20 years to raise their grandchild on top of their two kids. Miki is going to be more of a sister than mother and she can just live of her parents, child support and gov assistance for the rest of her life.

My problem is not the direction of the story but how its told. Somehow the fact that Miki and her family are so well dressed and made up doesn't make them to be the struggling middle class family. I just find the script dialogue too fantastical. Yeah I know doramas are not realistic but the complete lack of realism has prevented me from having apathy with the characters. This needs to be done in a more 'Daremo Shiranai' style.


AKIHABARA@DEEP

I just like the kick arse girl. I just find the stereotypical potrayal of the Otakus boring. Still watchable though its not on my list of priorities to finish.

BYAKUYAKOU

Love the misery. Unfortunately this show slowly losing the momentum from the 1st episode. After going to a fast pace start, the show shifted down to 3 gear for too long. Still its better than most shows.



DANCE DRILL

How can a show about cheerleaders be this boring........ I doubt watching the subbed version will change my mind.

KAZOKU

What a big waste of potential. I thought the writer had some grand plan but in the end, it ended too easily with lots of potential storylines unexplored. And they basically made Shin-chan completely useless to the story. WTF is the ending for his characters arc? Did someone not go to writing schoool.



KUROSAGI

Horribly written. I thought all the scams would at least get better and more complex instead they got boring. The main charactert is fucking horribly miscast. The disguises are so fucking lame and unconvincing. Not to mention really horrible ending which was my main reason for sticking with the show until the end. I just loved the having to work with my sworn enemy in order to get revenge against him bit.

NODAME

Very well done show. Just somehow didn't have the 'heart' that Swing Girls did. Can't fault them for excellent effort. Still a very watchable show, just not the classic it could have been. Now where did I put my Swing Girls dvd?



SUPPLI

Horrible show. Itoh Misaki should never be main actress again and that Kame needs to be shot. Can you say completely no chemistry whatsoever? And Itoh Misaki tried her best but she can't complex characters. Wanted to continue watching just for Shiraishi Miho and Shida Mirai but its not worth it. Maybe I should hire someone to edit out the main storyline. It had a very interesting side story.... sigh. Lame attempt to mix Long Vacation + Love Generation.

TATTA HITOTSU NO KOI

Someone shoot/hang/strangle that Kame fucker now. In the name of all that is good, get him the fuck away from jdoramas. At the very least, let him show he can act in supporting roles b4 pushing him. The 1st episode is too horribly written to speak off. Even Toda Erika could not make me watch ep 2.

HamsapSukebe Jdorama awards 2006

I was going to do one last year but I kept waiting for the last ep of Jyou no Kyoshitsu to come out and by the time it did, it was too late to do one. I did not watch every series out there and some series are not completely subbed yet, eg Byakuyakou but its still fun to look back and try to remember all the shows I watched.

BEST ACTOR: Abe Hiroshi (KDO)


Fucking no brainer of the year. Abe Hiroshi is most remembered as Ueda from Trick series and for playing numerous supporting characters. His magnificant acting in KDO gave life to one of the most memorable characters in Jdorama. His performance is a joy to watch.

Runner ups: Toyokawa Etsushi (Bengoshi no Kuzu), Kusanagi Tsuyoshi (Boku no Aruku Michi), Nagase Tomoya (My Boss My Hero)

BEST ACTRESS: Natsukawa Yui (KDO)

What, I actually beat all those skanky hos?

Very crowded field but end of the day, no woman captured my heart more than Hayasaka sensei. Her performance was nuanced yet spoke loudly. While she may not be able to carry a show, her acting had something that all the gravure idols turned actresses don't have: depth.

Runner ups: Ueno Juri (Nodame), Aya Euto (Attention Please)

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR: Furata Arata (Galcir)


He really carried this show from so-so to really good. Brilliant comedic actor and most memorable supporting character besides Ken and Stresemann.

Runner ups: Abe Sadao (Iryu) Ken-chan (KDO, yes I know he's a dog)

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Aragaki Yui (My Boss, My Hero)


There is no character who is more a paragon of innocence and joushi-kousei kawainess than Umemura-san.

Runner ups: Kuninaka Ryoko (KDO)

BEST GUEST ACTOR: Mitsuya Yoko (KDO & Bengoshi no Kuzu)


She appeared in just one episode in both series and she made the eps so much better. She may not be main actress material (yet) but her short lived appearances in both series were certainly very memorable.

BEST SOUNDTRACK: Iryu

No show comes close to how fucking excellent the music was in this show. There's a lot of moments which could have been lough out corny and lame but the music just made it so... cool.

Runner up: Nodame

BEST DORAMAS of 2006:

3) Iryu



Doesn't win any awards in the acting department except for Abe Sadao as the alcoholic anesthetian but its a bloody solid show. Damn good pacing, excellent music and gripping story.

2) Boku no Aruku Michi



Didn't really like it at first but the characters really grew on me it just kept getting better by the episode. Excellent acting, memorable characters and beautiful ending. What more could a d-addict ask for?

1) Kekkon Dekinai Otoko


One of the greatest jdoramas ever. This is one show where the characters have so much depth that they practically wrote the story themselves. Best writing and dialogue I've ever seen in Jdoramas ever. Hate to say it, but they'll never be another show like it. (Though I'd love to be proven wrong)

Sailor Fuku to Kikanjuu ep 3

This could be a great series, instead its bloody let down by shoddy writing. Take ep 3 for example which dwells on Sakuma's past. Yakuza with dead girlfriend story is cliched but works for sympathy, especially if the girl is really hot. The viewer will be pissed off that they can't perv at her for the rest of the series. Besides empathy, having a dead gf gives the yakuza license to do acts of extreme violence but still remain the 'face' of the show.

Hoshi Izumi surveying her WMDs.

The problem here is the brother of dead gf wanting to get revenge on Sakuma. OMG, it is one of the lamest plotlines ever. Hello, your sis died protecting Sakuma. Its not like he fucking shot her. And they try to justify Yuji's desire for revenge by saying that Sakuma is not remorseful cause he continued as a Yakuza.

Of course this all lead to the enevitable showdown with Hoshi Izumi crying that the sis died for Sakuma, he hasn't forgotten her blah blah blah. Someone should have fired the writer(s) and hired me. I can't believe the writer wrote Mukodono.

Real nice shot of Kyoizumi Kyoko and Nagasawa Masami. IMO They should have more screen time together...

What I would have done is spend more time making Yuji's blame on Sakuma more plausible. Say the gf wanted Sakuma to quit and he couldn't because of loyalty so they broke up. Then he changes his mind, goes see her and she gets shot. That would make more sense for Yuji to be pissed off. Or he gets shot and he comes crawling to her and his assailant follows and kills her.

Sailor fuku wo, nugasanaide, ima wa dare....

The other weak point is that they never said whether he or Yuji avenged her. Maybe they'll use it later in the series but its lame that they didn't even address it. Even if they bring it up later, how many freaking years has it been since she died?

The humour in this show is not funny; its stupid. The whole lame protecting Hoshi Izumi skit just makes the Medaka gumi seem like idiots. Not to mention that bald head on fire part. How much money did they spend on the lame smoke CG?

This exactly what I want to see in this show! Love this cap...

The high point of the episode is Hoshi Izumi getting pissed off and ready to kill. The whole draw of this show is wanting to see her transform from innocent joushi kousei to arse-kicking kumicho which is why I'll still follow this series. Its a damn shame that the writing sucks. Still, there's signs that the series is kicking into high gear. There's going to be lots of fighting and people are going to die. And I'm intrigued by Kyoizumi Kyoko's character. As long as they cut down on the failed attempts at humour, this show still can be saved.

Preview of ep 4. Goddam I'm excited, although I'm not into SM bondage......